To describe my experiences in the USA over the past (almost) 2 months would take a novel’s worth of pages to write. Suffice to say that my time here has been a combination of every feeling I have every had…and even some new ones that I’ve never felt before.
I used to judge the intensity of my feelings. I hated when the strength of my sadness, anger and frustration would be practically unbearable. I wished that I could be more moderate, like so many people seemed to be around me. But now I realize that for every inch of pain that I allow myself to feel, there is an equal inch added in the opposite direction. So, when I feel fulfillment, joy, creativity…it is on the same spectrum of complete intensity as my more challenging feelings…and this is the driving force behind the absolutely spectacular life I have had thus far. I have been at the top of the corporate ladder and also a nomad in the jungle. I have been just as humbled meeting The President of The United States as I have been speaking with the homeless man who used to sell magazines outside of my local grocery store. I have rafted the most intense rapids in Africa, hiked volcanoes in Guatemala, rappelled from waterfalls in Costa Rica and I have also spent months at a time doing absolutely nothing but reading and going to the beach. I am simply not moderate in any way, shape or form and that is not a wrong way to be…it never was.
So what is next for me? I am starting a business/project/empire, where I will support others who feel an urge to push their self-perceived boundaries and decide what sort of balance is best for them. It may not be as extreme as mine, but I believe that everyone deserves to do things in life that makes them feel unsafe, unsure and fearful of the unknown…for that is where the magic happens.
I see myself living in both Costa Rica and the United States, continuing to work on my own balance of the ‘being’ and the ‘doing.’ I see myself traveling more…there is still so much of the world that I haven’t seen! I see myself speaking to groups of people and encouraging them to follow their craziest dreams, for life is far too short to play it any other way. We owe it to ourselves and to the world to be the biggest and best version of ourselves.